Embracing the Beauty of Turning 46

As I finished my morning routine, yoga, sauna, shower, and getting ready for the day, I stood before the mirror taking in my reflection.  Today is no ordinary day – it is my 46th birthday, a milestone that seemed to beckon both excitement and contemplation.  I can’t help but marvel at the passage of time, a peculiar concept that has always fascinated me.  Turning 46 means celebrating another year of life and acknowledging the journey that has brought me to this point.  As I look in the mirror I can see the same youthful spark there, it hasn’t faded with time.  Instead, it is a reminder that age truly is just a number, and despite my trepidation of leaving my early 40s behind, I know that I can embark on a new and exciting season of my life.  This birthday invites me to embrace a new chapter of life, a phase that lies before me like uncharted territory.

The phase of midlife feels like a bittersweet dance between past and future, navigating through the winding trails of memories while simultaneously peering into the unknown.  The semi-empty nest is a tangible reminder of the years of nurturing and guiding my children toward independence.  It is a shift that brings both a sense of pride and a fair amount of nostalgia

Joshuas First Ocean Trip
Joshuas First Ocean Trip
Nicholas with our puppy
Nicholas with our puppy
Joshua off to Senior Kindergarten
Joshua off to Senior Kindergarten
Building Sandcastles at the Beach
Building Sandcastles at the Beach
Just having fun with my boys
Just having fun with my boys
Joshua Moving Out on His Own for College
Joshua Moving Out on His Own for College
Joshua Graduating from College
Joshua Graduating from College
Nicholas Graduating from College
Nicholas Graduating from College

Amidst these changes and reflections, I find myself embracing a newfound sense of balance. The whirlwind of responsibilities that once characterized my days has slowed down, allowing me to evaluate what truly matters in this season of life. It’s a self-indulgent time—a period of unearthing the core of my identity beyond the roles I used to play. It’s a moment that takes me back to the calculations I made when embarking on parenthood—when my children are this age, I will be that age, and then I can do these things.

One of the most beautiful gifts that come with age is the wisdom of experience.  The journey through parenthood, the joys and challenges of a long-lasting marriage, and the resilience fostered through life’s obstacles have all woven into my fabric.  I realize that I am no longer afraid of life’s uncertainties.  I have learned to weather storms and turn adversity into opportunities for growth.  This confidence that has been growing as I age allows me to embrace my authentic self, unapologetically and without fear of judgment.

With each passing year, I find myself in awe of life’s simple blessings.  A breathtaking sunset painted in the sky with colour that words cannot capture.  the serene symphony of nature in the garden has become a sanctuary for my soul.  The more I savour these moments, the more I understand that life’s beauty lay not in the grand gestures but in the subtleties of everyday life.

I have discovered the joy of self-indulgence, the passion for creativity and the rediscovery of myself.  I am not who I was when I married at age 20, I am a more complete, filled-out version of myself, and as I age I continue to expand and grow and create a life filled with the things that are important to me, not to please anyone else.  It is a freedom that you don’t always recognize when you are younger.  The roles I had once fulfilled so diligently were not lost, but rather, they have evolved.  This newfound space allows me to immerse myself in activities that bring joy to my heart – rediscovering passions that had been tucked away and exploring new interests that have piqued my curiosity.  It is an opportunity to nurture my soul, embrace personal growth, and cherish the relationships that have brought love and joy into my life.

So on my 46th birthday, I made a silent promise to myself – to  live with a heart full of gratitude for the past, and open mind for the future and an unwavering appreciation for the present.  Turning 46 is not just another number, it is an invitation to embark on a journey of self-discovery, growth, and celebration.  With a spirit of excitement, I welcome this new chapter, eager to embrace the beauty of this unique phase of life.  Here’s to a fulfilling and joyous 46th year!

46 year old me, enjoying this phase of my life
15 year old me, shy and unsure of herself

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